What keeps you from taking the first action steps that lead to a glow of satisfaction in your life? What makes you sell yourself short and not go for more-- more creativity, more depth, more connection, more passion, more personal autonomy-- whatever is your heart's desire? What helps you break free of stuckness and limitation, and go forward towards what you really want?
In a workshop I offered recently, I did a demonstration on how to explore options with an attractive woman in her mid-30's looking for a new career. As we talked about her hesitation to begin a career search, it was clear that her inner saboteur was actively telling her that she could not possibly succeed, so why try. With my coaching support, she began to question the current validity of old messages about work, such as "You'll lose financial security and prestige" or "You haven't got what it takes to make a major change."
Still, she experienced a sense of paralysis in her body even considering beginning to move forward. I asked her to suggest options that she might follow-- from the safe to the improbable-- just to free up her mind. Then I had her literally walk from option to option, talking about how her mind and body experienced each possibility. This gave her the chance to begin exploring different options around risk-taking. She finally chose to commit to begin her process of searching out a new career with informational interviews-- low risk, but interesting and giving her a feeling of forward momentum. She realized that in freeing herself to take the first step, she could go for a career that is fulfilling rather than just getting by.
If you want or need to make changes to reach new levels of satisfaction in professional, personal, and spiritual areas of your life, try some of my tips below and see which ones energize you and inspire you to break out of limitation and embrace the quality of life you desire. Remember that it is your passion for fulfillment that lights your way!
1) Consider at least three options or choices for any place in your life where you feel stuck and want to move forward. For each one, visualize what it's like to be there, and feel the following: (a) the sensations in your body (e.g., is it easier to breathe? is there tension in your belly?) (b) the quality of your energy (e.g., are you feeling glowing and expansive? are you feeling tired and listless?) (c) any old thoughts or inner messages that arise (e.g., "I don't have enough money, qualifications, etc., to try this" or "My parents or friends won't approve or understand if I try something different").
2) What is your safest option? What is your choice that gives you the most energy? What is the option with the most risk for you?" Which option (or combination of options) do you feel will give you the greatest satisfaction?
3) If you pick an option that has risk for you-- requiring you to "stretch," grow, or do more than you've ever done before-- what will help you move into and explore this new direction? What kinds of support do you want or need?
4) Celebrate being willing to explore possibilities, and not just accept familiar paths or choices! You are growing and learning and becoming who you truly are. Whatever you choose to do now, you will have greater satisfaction knowing that you have freed and integrated the most up-to-date messages of your body, mind, and spirit in your current decision.
Eve Siegel, M.S., CPCC, ACC, CMT, is a Certified Life Coach and the founder of Kailas Life Transitions Coaching & Body-Energy Therapy. Eve delights in helping people move out of stuckness into presence, energy, and aliveness-- so they are free to be who they are and accomplish what they wish with confidence, passion, and joy. Her coaching specialty is helping people enrich their lives during transitions, enhance their lives with creativity, and develop lives in balance. She also offers body-based work and support for transforming stress into energy for moving through life transitions and healing from trauma. Offices in El Cerrito (near Berkeley) and Palo Alto, CA. Coaching sessions by phone and in-office. Eve offers presentations on personal and professional development issues, including career change, retirement, interpersonal relationships, spiritual connection, and managing time and energy. http://www.kailaslifecoaching.com
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